Posted on Wednesday, March 9, 2016

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and You Have to Reach Out and Touch Somebody’s Hand

“Just reach out and make someone’s day a better day…”

fear1 In our daily lives, it seldom dawns on us that there are other people all around us. How often have you stopped and thought about the person working at the deli counter, or driving the bus, or buying that coffee? What do you know about them? Nothing? That’s more than likely the case. But what if you extended yourself and made friends with that person? How would they feel if you took it upon yourself to walk over and say “hello?” How much effort did that take? It takes hardly any effort, but it may change the whole direction of that person’s day. Now imagine if you could change the day of every single person you ran into? Imagine if you could make everyone happy. Wouldn’t that be something? You can. All it takes is reaching out and making friends wherever you go, and making friends without wanting anything in return. A selfless friendship.

Hello Is All You Need Say

Okay, so sometimes you don’t know what to say to people. We’ve all been there. Sometimes I don’t know what to say to people. I’ve found that just a simple “hello,” “hi,” or “how are you?” makes all the difference when breaking the ice. Try it out… just turn to that person standing over there and say hello!

Some People Aren’t Friendly… and That’s Okay!

Occasionally, you are going to find that people just aren’t interested in being friendly. That’s okay, too. Extend yourself, and if they don’t want to reach out and grab your extended hand—then don’t force them. Just smile and move on. You’ve made your point.

It’s About You

Making friends, and the ability to make friends, is all about you. It’s all a skill that you are learning. Being able to make friends easily means that you will have crucial social skills—skills that you can apply to anything you want to do. Whenever we interact with other people, we are learning. Every single person we meet reacts in a different way—speak to enough people, and soon you will be able to read body language.

There’s Something Wrong…

When someone looks upset, many people don’t want to get involved. People just don’t want to be part of the problem or even the solution. I disagree with this. I think it’s crucial for us to try and help people we feel are in distress. There’s no harm in asking what’s wrong, and there’s no harm in trying to help someone along their way in life.

Be Gentle

Try to consider every single new conversation to be as fluffy as a cloud. Don’t just beat your way into a conversation and push that powerful personality of yours. Be gentle, and be concise. Let people know that you are a listener. A listener is never in need of friends because everyone wants to be his or her friend.

Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, DNP, MA, BSN
Your Vision Midwife, Lifestyle Entrepreneur
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Posted on Monday, March 7, 2016

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 10

The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered. This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to look at a fairly common fear that stops people from reaching their full potential—a fear called Atelophobia by experts, but known as a fear of imperfection to you and me.

Sometimes, we all struggle with the idea that we aren’t good enough. It’s a common enough assessment when we look at all the achievements of one person and stack them up against our own. I mean, if I were to try and stack the achievements of a great statesman up against my own—I may come out short. But does that make me less valuable as a human being? That’s the question millions of people around the world are asking themselves. Am I just too imperfect to be of use to society?

Recognizing Your Phobia

If you are finding yourself overcome with fear each time you consider doing something, then you may very well be suffering from a fear of imperfection. You may worry a lot about the idea of taking on a role or opportunity and finding out that you just aren’t cut out to do it. Do you turn down chances and opportunities? Do you want to stay away from the world and never have to deal with anything? Are you scared that your boss may discover that you may not be as good at your job as he thought you were?

Overcoming Your Phobia

Who IS Perfect?

Take a look around the world. What a hopeless mess it seems. Seriously. If you want to look at imperfection, you should start by looking at the world in which we live. We live with imperfection every single day, and that’s okay! It’s important to realize that nobody is perfect. Like every other human being, you can get things wrong, but there’s nothing wrong with that.

Being Wrong Isn’t Bad!

You know sometimes we all get things wrong. I do. I can guarantee at some point in life, every single human being has been wrong. But that isn’t bad. It’s all part of this giant learning curve we call life. It’s adventurous, it’s fun, and it’s all an experience. Don’t set out to be wrong—but if you are wrong… who cares? Learn from the experience and try again. As a famous man once said, “If at first you don’t succeed… try, try again!”

Fools Rush In…

It takes a smart person to realize that all situations can be handled—but must be handled in different ways. If you are starting a new job, try taking your first few days steadily. Get to grips with the tasks at hand. It’s like dating. You take it slowly and build to a crescendo. Just take things one step at a time, and you’ll find that you will make few mistakes.

Relax

Just relax! Even if your boss does realize you aren’t cut out for the job… the worst thing he or she can do is fire you. Relax, enjoy yourself and do what you want to do. Let nobody stand in your way.

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Posted on Friday, March 4, 2016

Publishing Your Book: Platforms: Part Three

once upon After writing a book, many people want to know how one goes about publishing a book. A well-known author once said recently that “it’s no great feat to get one’s book published—it’s no great mountain to climb.” He is right, but his opinion is subjective. To you, reading this blog, it is a huge mountain to climb to get your book published. There are many paths you can take up that mountain, but it is still a huge feat.

There are several platforms that allow you to publish an ebook online. Knowing their strengths and weaknesses will help you decide which platform will help you achieve your writing goals. In this article, we will be taking a look at four of the major platforms.

Amazon

Hundreds of thousands of books are published and sold on Amazon each year. It is said that Amazon is the biggest player in the book business. As a writer, you may find it hard to achieve any success without the platform Amazon offers. Amazon is a company that rewards loyalty. By joining the Amazon KDP program, you will gain a 70% royalty share—but you will have to have your e-book exclusively on Amazon. There are many pros and cons to using Amazon… but, as many authors are discovering, success in the book world can be made much tougher if you don’t use them.

Barnes & Noble

A traditional bookseller with a large online platform that you may be tempted to use. Barnes & Noble are one of the easiest platforms to become part of. Their formatting process is one of the easiest to navigate. Just remember that because you have your book published online with Barnes & Noble, it doesn’t mean you will automatically be available inside stores.

iBooks

For some time, people thought that iBooks was going to overtake Amazon. That has been proven as folly. Many authors consider the iBooks platform to be a mess—without any real co-ordination or easy access. This platform is easy to get onto, but the chances are that you won’t have instant success here.

Smashwords

One of the more interesting platforms. Smashwords has been around for a long time now and has a proven track record. If you have a free book, Smashwords may be the one for you to go for. It’s easy to release and market a free book with them. If you are looking for paid sales—it may be tougher for you to get any traction on Smashwords. The formatting is easily navigated, though, so don’t worry about the technical side of things.

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Posted on Wednesday, March 2, 2016

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and Dreams Are What Life Is Made Of…

once upon “Dreams Are What Lives Are Made Of…”

Ask any successful person how they entered the business of being successful. The answer that you will hear overwhelmingly is that they dreamed of doing something. Something big. Something important. Something that nobody else had ever done. They dreamed of becoming, finding, having, being, saying. The dreams you’ve had are a direction. A desire that comes from deep down inside your body and soul. Dreaming is half the journey to success.

But, you may say, BUT… How do I know what I want, and how do I get what I want? That’s the hard part! You have a dream journey—but you have to make it from place A to place B. It may be a difficult journey with lots of frustrating stops, starts and detours. It may be something you feel that you can’t do. It may be that you are at a place in your life that doesn’t allow you to pursue your dreams—but that doesn’t mean you won’t stop dreaming. It doesn’t mean that tonight you won’t discover the way to make your dreams come true. There is nothing stopping you from doing anything in your mind—your dreams cannot be taken away from you—so instead of decreeing that in reality your dreams are nothing more than made up, you should embrace them, watch for an opportunity and strike when you feel the time is right.

Knowing Your Dreams

Sometimes people wake up after a vivid dream, and for a short time after they wake up, they can remember the whole thing. As your day progresses, you lose more and more of that dream, and within a few hours it may be gone. How about keeping a pen and a piece of paper by your bed? When you wake up in the morning, jot down your dream. This way you can see patterns, direction, and make sense of what your inner self is telling you—at your own pace—without fear of forgetting it.

No Dreams?

Rubbish. Everyone has dreams. It may just be that you don’t feel your dreams are achievable, therefore, you may be more likely to quash your dreams before they can even take shape. Think about it—at some point in your life you have wanted something. You’ve wanted to go somewhere, see something, be someone. Think back and try to reconnect with your dreams.

Honestly…

Okay, I am not saying that tomorrow you can wake up and make your dream come true. You are welcome to try that, but for the majority of people it will be a journey or a quest. It will be something that takes time to take shape. You need to be honest with yourself. Is this the right direction? Am I in the right place to make my dreams come true?

Maybe It’s Time…

From time to time, people get a buzzing feeling that it’s time. When you get that feeling—act on it. If it feels right, if the time is right—do it. Just DO IT!

Allow Yourself Space

When you are lying in bed at night, think about the wide blackness of space. Look at the planets, look at the distance between Earth and the other planets in our solar system. Now imagine that your journey is between Earth and Jupiter. How would you make that journey? What would you need? How long would it take? Problem solving skills are going to be very important to you as you follow the path leading to your dreams—ask yourself questions and come up with the answers. The more you come up with answers, the more you will think outside the box.

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Posted on Monday, February 29, 2016

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 9

This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to look at a fairly common fear that stops people from reaching their full potential. This fear is known as a fear of being worthy.

Sometimes we all struggle with feeling like we deserve the things we get out of life. It’s hard to accept at times that we are meant to be happy, that we are meant to do all the things we want to do. It’s also hard to understand that sometimes others will not be happy about our successes—sometimes people will be jealous, angry or upset that we have achieved things. But that doesn’t mean that we should feel unworthy.

Recognizing Your Phobia

The first step to recognizing this phobia is to try and find the moments when you turn down an opportunity due to not feeling good enough, strong enough or intelligent enough to take a chance. Have you ever felt not “good” enough, or strong enough, or as though you don’t “deserve” to have something good happen to you? When we can examine these moments, we can deal with the way we feel. It’s important to pick up on these feelings to deal with them. So when you find yourself in a good position—where something good is happening—if you suddenly feel negative, try to isolate that feeling. That’s the phobia we need to fix.

Overcoming Your Phobia

Yes, You Can

If you wake up in the morning and you feel that you can’t face something, realize you can face it. There’s nothing to it. Just jump up, have a coffee, pace yourself and roll right into it. Yes, you may be terrified deep down inside, but on the surface you can look as cool as a cucumber. Fake it until you make it.

Who Says You Can’t?

So you just landed the opportunity of a lifetime. Nobody thinks you can turn it into anything—but you can! You don’t need me to tell you about your own talents. You have all the talent you need to turn this project into a success. Don’t listen to too many people who say you can’t—that’s bound to make you feel like you aren’t good enough. Instead, listen to those who say you can.

Careful Means Success

There are two ways to handle a situation you are unsure of. You can rush in and make mistakes; or you can careful manoeuvre yourself and make it a success. If you are unsure of your talent—if you lack the confidence to feel that you can do it—take it slowly and learn as you go. Your confidence will grow with every success.

Connect

A friend in need is a friend forever, if treated correctly. The friend you make today may be the one who offers you a job in a few years. If you are lacking confidence or skills, or if you don’t feel worthy, make friends and allow those friendships to build your confidence. The more support you get, the better you will feel about what you are doing.

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Posted on Friday, February 26, 2016

Publishing A Book: Editing: Part Two

One of the most controversial things about the self-publishing business is that authors now opt to not have their work edited. This article will all be about the pros and cons of having your work edited.

Why You Should Have Your Work Edited

Editing is the last chance for you, as an author, to have your work checked over by a professional set of eyes before you leave yourself open to negative reviews. For anyone who is seriously looking to skip the editing step, you need to consider whether or not your writing can stand the scrutiny of readers around the world. Are you sure you have every error corrected? No? Well, now might be the time to consider looking up a good proofreader to have those problems ironed out.

Who Is a Good Editor?

Unless you’re an English teacher, or someone greatly skilled in the English language, you won’t know what makes a well-edited and proofread book. That’s why you need to speak to several editors and find out who has the skills you need. Don’t just contact one editor—contact a bunch of them and see what they come back with.

The Responsibility Lies with You

Sorry, but even with an editor, the responsibility lies with you to correct mistakes. You should take your editor’s advice seriously—try to cover all the areas of the book they’re concerned about. Don’t cut corners or miss out steps. Just go through their work and take great pains to make sure you are correcting all the errors they have pointed out.

Editing Takes Time

I know we all want things done instantly, but quality editing takes time. Try to ignore those instincts inside your body that will want you to rush the editor. Let them get it done in their own time, and let them do it properly. Do not badger, bug or try to push the editor to get the work done quickly. All you will get is missed errors and embarrassment later on that will be nobody’s fault—but your own.

A Good Editor Is Probably Right… Even Though You Attended English Class

It’s common for people to know best. It really is. But when it comes to hiring an expert to work on your book, you should consider their opinion to be the right opinion. Don’t argue or try to assert your expertise of the English language. If you start to suspect that the editor isn’t catching all of the errors—gently let them know. If they turn out not to be competent, find another editor.

Connections & Friends

Yes—that’s right. Friends. A good editor is hard to find. It’s in your interest to build a relationship with a good editor and to make that relationship work. If you are planning to write more books, you will need an editor. The way you treat your editor may be the deciding factor in the quality of your future publications.

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Posted on Wednesday, February 24, 2016

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and “No” Is Sometimes the Most Important Word…

fear11 “No can be the most important ‘yes’ you’ve ever said.”

One of the most common problems faced by people around the world is an inability to say no. People don’t feel that they can say no; they feel pressured to always make other people happy. No is just a word many people can’t say… and I’m telling you that No might be the most important word you may ever learn to say confidently. Have you ever thought about the millions of problems that could be avoided by someone just saying “no” and saying nothing further? No… No… No… No…

Warrior Wednesday is all about empowering you, and giving you the tools that you need to make your life better. No is just another one of those tools that will serve you well. Deep down, nobody wants to say no, but sometimes we have to, and our lives are better for having said it.
“No” Never Means “Yes”

You know some salesmen say that a “No” is just a “Yes”? Well, they’re wrong. When you feel deep down that your answer is “No,” it’s “NO!” That’s the important thing to remember. When you are saying “No” you mean “No.”
Cut Out the Conversation

One of the best ways for people to get around “No” is by continuing a conversation and going around the side of your “No.” When you say “No” to someone—I’d suggest cutting the rest of the conversation short. It’s no, and don’t give anyone the chance to turn your “No” into a yes.

It Feels Bad…

Saying “no” can feel bad. It really can. But when you truly want to say “No,” you should just say “No.” Nobody can force you to do anything. You call the shots in your life, and you control what you do. Try not to feel bad for saying “No.” Just do it and move on.

But!

The most common response to “No” is “But…” and those buts can go on for a long time. Try to just keep your direction and move forward with it. Don’t listen to the reasoning and arguments of others. Don’t be persuaded or sold on doing something you don’t want to do. Every time you hear “but” think “No!”

One No at a Time

You won’t wake up tomorrow with the ability to say “No,” but you should start saying it in your head. You should try to envision what it would look like to tell someone “No.” If you can comfortably visualize saying “no,” you can actually say it whenever you want. Practice saying “no” in front of the mirror—and every single time you need to say it, say it. It could save your life.

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Posted on Monday, February 22, 2016

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 8

fear11 The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered. This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to look at a fairly common fear that stops people from reaching their full potential. This is a fear of losing your freedom.

Sometimes, success means that we have less time to do the things we want. Many of us just take this as a given—Rome wasn’t built on vacations, after all. But for some people, the fear of actually losing their free time is so crippling they would rather not have any part in a more successful and productive life.

This is sometimes called a fear of commitment, and it really is. It’s a gripping fear that will stop you getting involved in some of the most life-changing aspects of your life. These aspects can range from marriage, all the way up to taking an executive position in a company.

Recognizing Your Phobia

The first step is overcoming your fear of commitment is working out what you’re actually afraid of. Because—and you might not realize this—you’re not actually afraid of commitment.

Overcoming Your Phobia

More Freedom Feeds Freedom

If you wake up when you want to, to go to a job that is an expression of what you really believe in, hang out with inspiring people who value your opinion and demand that you do what you’re really passionate about, then you’re not going to really care about those few hours at night, and commitment won’t seem like such a scary proposition.

You’re going to feel free already, regardless of what happens between 6pm and 10pm.

Fulfil Desires

If you are using your time to fulfil your desires, you are going to feel accomplished. If you feel accomplished, you are not going to feel so stressed about commitment or losing freedom. If you spend your days doing the things you want, you can use the nights to do things that wouldn’t necessarily be your first choice of activity.

Careful Relationships

If you are careful about the relationships you allow to grow, you will find that your commitment to them isn’t stifling at all. The stifling relationships are the ones we don’t want, and when we are feeling trapped, those are the ones we will fight hardest against. Be careful who you create a relationship with, and you should find commitment easier to handle.

Friends

As with many problems, a problem shared is a problem halved. Do you have someone in your life that you trust? If you do, then now might be the time to turn to them for some help. If you don’t—you may need to correct that problem first. If you are without anyone with whom to share your problems, you need to start creating careful relationships.

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Posted on Friday, February 19, 2016

Publishing A Book: Types of Publishing: Part One

So what I would suggest is that you look at the two different types of publishing. Self-publishing and traditional publishing. Both have huge pros and cons—and both differ greatly.

Self-Publishing

Hundreds of thousands of books are published each year on self-publishing platforms like Amazon KDP and Createspace, Draft2Digital, Barnes & Noble, and the list goes on. But what does it actually mean to self-publish? It means that you will have a book on the market for purchase on a platform that will do no promotion for you. You will be promoting your own book, but that’s a good thing because you can control price, keywords, optimization, content, description and all the other goodies that a major publisher probably won’t let you change. You can also run promotions through these platforms and allow your imagination to take over. On the other hand, you will be the one paying for editing, cover design, promotions and the costs that would normally be covered by a reputable publisher. Self-published paperback books are held in disregard by many for being of lesser quality—but as print-on-demand platforms like Createspace grow, their standards have grown, too.

Traditional Publishing

Traditional publishing is the old, tried and tested way of getting a book onto the market. You will, in many cases, have secured an agent who will fight the good fight to get your book picked up by a publisher. The publisher, if reputable, will cover the costs of editing, designing a cover, and to some degree, promoting your book. You will have little control of the way your book is presented, you will be bound by contract to the whims of the publisher, and you will be given royalty statements every six months or so to show progress. You will not get an advance unless you are a very popular author or an author they feel will be very popular, for example a celebrity with a memoir to sell. You will be constrained by being traditionally published but will save on all the costs and headaches of publishing a book.

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Posted on Wednesday, February 17, 2016

It’s Warrior Wednesday and There’s A World of Choice

“Unless you try to find something… you won’t know the options to take…”

fear1 Sometimes I wonder if people realize the amount of choices they have. Sometimes it’s hard to see any other alternative, and sometimes it’s tough to really see past the walls that face us down every single day. For example, take someone who is looking for a job, for the first time, a brand new jobseeker. He, or she, has no work experience, no credibility with an employer, and is likely to, have a low earning capability. How does that person see past all the negative things they have found themselves looking at? Well the first step would be to look at the choices and opportunities surrounding them. What can they offer? What do they want? It might not be easy to become a doctor overnight—but there are industries where a newbie can be given the scope to grow, fairly easily. Take the sales industry, for example. Age doesn’t matter, experience can help—but isn’t essential—but talent matters? If you are a person who likes people you may be looking at the wrong industry—you may want to give sales a chance. Now what else do you like doing? Look at what you have, what you want and then go for what you feel to be the right choice.

Day-To-Day Opportunities

It has been said that being in a job will help you get a job. But that doesn’t mean you should give up on getting employment. Try looking at some of the opportunities that come to you every single day. Is the lawn overgrown on the house yonder? Go over and see if they would like to hire someone to give it a trim. Is there something wrong with your neighbours fence? Maybe they would like it to be mended. We are reminded daily that there are jobs to be done—and those jobs do not necessarily take place in an office.

Money, what’s it good for?

Absolutely everything! But you can make just as much money being self-employed as you can from any job, anywhere. It’s a fact. A gardener can make as much money as a top level executive—without the stress level. Yes, a corporate job will give you money, but a simple gardening job will give you money too. Don’t make your judgements based on money though—make your choice based on the job, your ability, your need and the way your gut feels.

The Dream Job…

Isn’t always your first job. If you do take a job that isn’t your dream job, don’t despair! Try to make the very best of it. The experience you will gain will make you a stronger candidate for your dream job.

Nobody Matters ‘Cept Yourself

Yes we need to earn money to pay for this, that and the other. Yes it does take money to live… but you have but one life to live and you should always try to do what you want to do. Don’t be pressured—if you want to aim high… take a step ladder and climb as quickly as you dare.

One Step at a Time

As always this is important. Some people reach the top by 25. Some people reach the top at 85. Some people never reach the top. It isn’t a race—it’s an experience. Every single day is an experience and don’t worry about getting anywhere too quickly. Try to enjoy everything as it happens, and don’t let yourself be conned into thinking that you aren’t making good progress.

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Success Blueprint for Your Inner You

Be the Hero in Your Own Success Rescue(TM)

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and You Have to Reach Out and Touch Somebody’s Hand

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 10

Publishing Your Book: Platforms: Part Three

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and Dreams Are What Life Is Made Of…

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 9

Publishing A Book: Editing: Part Two

It’s Warrior Wednesday, and “No” Is Sometimes the Most Important Word…

Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 8

Publishing A Book: Types of Publishing: Part One

It’s Warrior Wednesday and There’s A World of Choice