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Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 15

fear11The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered. This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to take a look at Hypnophobia, a crippling fear that can stop you reaching your full potential, and can even stop you from living a normal, everyday life.

Hypnophobia, clinophobia or somniphobia, as the condition is often called, is the irrational and excessive fear of sleep. It may result from a feeling of loss of control, or from repeating nightmares or anxiety over the loss of time that could be spent accomplishing tasks or maximizing leisure time instead of sleeping.

Recognizing Your Phobia

Hypnophobia, known as fear of sleep and fear of being hypnotized, can significantly impact the quality of life. It can cause panic attacks and is often defined as an abnormal, persistent and unwarranted fear of sleep or being hypnotized. Rapid breathing, shortness of breath, sweating, feelings of dread and nausea are all symptoms of hypnophobia. Every year, hypnophobia causes distress to countless people. Most hypnophobia therapies take months or years, and sometimes require the patient to be exposed repeatedly to their fear. Therefore, it makes the condition even worse.

Focus

Focusing on your mind can tell you a lot about your fears. The way you describe things that happen to yourself inside your own head can be very telling. What really scares you about sleep? Try to focus and discover what the problem is. Are you afraid of nightmares? Do you think you won’t wake up? Do you feel it’s wasted time? Once you know the problem, you can start to fix it.

Relax and Breathe

Try heading to bed with a book. Lie on your bed until you begin to get drowsy and linger in a state of drowsiness. You are not asleep, yet not awake. But is there anything scaring you? Try to take notice of the world around you while you are in that state. If you start to feel uncomfortable—open your eyes. You can leave at any time.

The Positive

Singing your favorite song, watching your favorite movie, spending time with your friends, family and loved ones can all put you in a positive frame of mind. Perhaps organize a sleepover with friends who will be at your side throughout the process of sleep. If you can’t do it alone, do it with others—that is, after all, what friends are for.

A Positive Spin

Waking up all refreshed, relaxed and happy can be the end result of sleep—you know that. Why don’t you try giving sleep a positive spin? Tell yourself all the reasons why you should enjoy sleep, and try to keep them in mind—sleep is an enjoyable thing. Just try telling yourself that it is.

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Publishing Your Book: Covers: Part Eight

fear1After writing a book, many people want to know how one goes about publishing a book. A well-known author once said recently that “it’s no great feat to get one’s book published—it’s no great mountain to climb.” He is right, but his opinion is subjective. To you, reading this blog, it is a huge mountain to climb to get your book published. There are many paths you can take up that mountain, but it is still a huge feat.

This week we are going to look at some pointers about cover design. Covers are a selling tool like no other. They are usually the first thing people see, and they are usually the thing that makes someone buy or not buy. Covers capture interest—so it’s important for you to have the right one.

The wrong cover can be devastating to your sales. A poor cover can turn off readers and can even cause your book to be returned by customers. Bad covers can also lead to poor reviews. But what do I mean by a bad cover? Let’s look at the four biggest problems we see on covers. You can see covers that have these problems all over Amazon.

• Spelling errors on the cover
• Poor punctuation
• Pixelated images
• Poor name and title placement

But these are not the only things you have to think about when putting your cover together. You also have to become an ad-man and create a cover that looks good as a thumbnail. I bet you didn’t think about that! Yes, your cover has to stand out as a thumbnail on Amazon. So keep that in mind and test your covers. Shrink your cover in size and spend some time looking at it. Can you still make out the image on the front? Does it still look as attractive? Would you buy that book?

Give it a try—and see for yourself!

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How Much Can You Do During a Warrior Wednesday?

fear1“Do more, see more, feel more, achieve more… make Wednesday YOUR day for achievement!”

Have you ever wondered about the people who seem to zoom through their day and achieve everything they started out wanting to achieve? Have you ever wondered how they do it? I’m sure each of us knows someone who can get much more done in a day than we believe possible. The super filer, the busy typist, the amazing salesman. What gives those people such drive?

It really comes down to the need to meet goals. Some people have an inbuilt need to achieve everything straight away. But there are ways for you to also help yourself make more from your days. This week, we will be talking about increasing productivity during our days, so our evenings can be less stressful.

Make Notes

The most successful people in the world always carry a notepad in their pockets to make notes. Many of us use our computers or phones and make notes on the diaries we have there. But this doesn’t seem to cut it for many people—it’s better to write it down and refer to something that is real—a piece of paper.

Time Management

Those who are super achievers know that time is a finite thing. On a daily basis, we only have so much time to do things. That’s why it’s important for us to make the most from our time. Try timing your activities, multi-tasking or combining tasks. This will help you cut down on the time you are spending on an activity and will cut the number of things you have to do.

Relax…

Even during the most stressful day, successful people find the time to wind down. Even in the office, you can spare a few moments every day to take your mind off work, meditate for a few minutes or read the news. Relaxation is part of what makes us successful. We have to know when to turn on the standby button.

Colleagues Can Be Fun

Try to be as social as possible. The more social you are at work, the more you feel like part of the team. Try interacting with as many people as you possibly can—and make friends. Working with friends is much better than working with people you hardly know.

Wake Up, Gotta Get Out of Bed

What can really set back our days is being late for work. Once you are late for work, you can expect your day to become sluggish. Try heading to bed earlier, waking up earlier, watching the news, having a relaxing breakfast and then heading to work. There’s no reason to rush anything in your life—take it at its own pace!

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Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 14

fear1The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered.

This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to take a look at sociophobia, a crippling fear that can stop you reaching your full potential, and can even stop you from living a normal, everyday life.

Sociophobia is the fear of society or people. People with this phobia find it hard to even have or maintain friendships.

The origin of the word socio is Latin (meaning interpersonal relationships) and phobia is Greek (meaning fear). Sociophobia is considered to be a social phobia, which is discussed on the home page. Sociophobia is also known as anthropophobia and related to phobanthropy, which is a morbid dread of being around other people and of human society in general.

Recognizing Your Phobia

The symptoms of sociophobia can vary greatly by person depending on their level of fear. The symptoms typically include extreme anxiety, dread and anything associated with panic such as shortness of breath, rapid breathing, irregular heartbeat, excessive sweating, nausea, dry mouth, nausea, inability to articulate words or sentences, dry mouth and shaking. If you are finding you’re sweating with an increased heartbeat when in the presence of people, you may well be suffering from sociophobia.

Overcoming Your Phobia

Recognizing Negative Thoughts

The first step is to identify the automatic negative thoughts that underlie your fear of social situations. For example, if you’re worried about an upcoming work presentation, the underlying negative thought might be: “I’m going to blow it. Everyone will think I’m completely incompetent.”

Challenge Everything!

It helps to ask yourself questions about the negative thoughts: “Do I know for sure that I’m going to blow the presentation?” or “Even if I’m nervous, will people necessarily think I’m incompetent?” Through this logical evaluation of your negative thoughts, you can gradually replace them with more realistic and positive ways of looking at social situations that trigger your anxiety.

Feel No Fear

It can be incredibly frightening to think about why you feel and think the way you do about social situations, but understanding the reasons for your anxieties will help lessen their negative impact on your life.

Look Around You!

In order to reduce self-focus, pay attention to what is happening around you, rather than monitoring yourself or focusing on symptoms of anxiety in your body. Try looking at those around you, the sky, trees, plants or anything else that is going on in your vicinity. Focus on the world at large.

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Publishing Your Book: Amazon Free Giveaways: Part Seven

once uponAfter writing a book, many people want to know how one goes about publishing a book. A well-known author once said recently that “it’s no great feat to get one’s book published—it’s no great mountain to climb.” He is right, but his opinion is subjective. To you, reading this blog, it is a huge mountain to climb to get your book published. There are many paths you can take up that mountain, but it is still a huge feat.

One of the basic things you can do to raise awareness of your book on Amazon is to set up a free giveaway through the KDP system. This is an opt-in system that you can choose to join. KDP allows you five days per enrolment period. You can use those five days together or separately; and during each day of free giveaway, your book will be available for people to download for free from Amazon. It’s pretty simple, eh? Well not entirely. There are still problems, the chief one being that you still need to drive traffic to the Amazon page and encourage people to download the book.

The upside to this is that if the promotion is done properly, you will get a huge dose of publicity and a run of strong paid sales. These paid sales will drive your rankings and will turn into more sales. It takes some time to set up a successful giveaway—but it can pay off in a big way.

Free Doesn’t Mean Desirable

There are thousands of books available for free download every single month. Just because you have your book available for free, it doesn’t mean that thousands of people will automatically download it. You have to ask yourself a few questions. The first is: Does my book have an audience? The second is: Where are the people who like my book spending their time online? The third is: How am I going to reach that audience? Don’t just rely on a book being free to drive interest—try to actually seek out your audience and present them with the opportunity to download your book.

Using Freebooksy and Other Free Book Mailing Lists

There are a lot of aids to help you drive your book to a bigger audience. One of the biggest is a mailing list called Freebooksy. This is a large mailing list that goes out to readers via email. You can get your book placed on the list, if you meet their criteria, and you will find that their subscribers will start downloading your book. There are other services like this—Bookbub, etc. that perform the same job.

Rankings

Being the number one free downloaded book doesn’t mean you will necessarily become the number one paid book. It’s easier to gain a number one when the book is free, but you may find it more of a struggle to reach the paid number one position. Don’t be concerned when your free giveaway ends and you go back into the paid rankings—you may be ranked far lower—but the chances are that your ranking will climb due to the publicity you’ve received from the free giveaway.

Banners

Some authors like to add a banner to the front of their book cover. The banner can draw attention to the fact the book is free, or will be free, and people who see the book on Amazon will see the banner. Little techniques like this can really help boost your free giveaway and draw attention to your book.

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It’s Warrior Wednesday. How do you feel today, friend?

fear11“Knowing that you are thriving, achieving, loving and lasting is what keeps me going!

Have you ever wondered why some people prosper, and some just never seem to make their goals reality? I think everyone has, but the truth is that it really doesn’t matter. Some of us have an easy road to success—and others have to work at it. But all success should be celebrated and congratulated because the success of one human being means that our success is just as achievable.

Think for a second about the people you meet in your everyday life. Don’t you sometimes meet negative folk who just seem to tear others down? What do you think makes them so unhappy? Is their own lack of self-achievement really that painful? Then sometimes you meet people who are vibrant, happy, optimistic and open to achievement. How different can two groups of people be? Very different. But the question is: Who are you?

Are you the negative hater of achievement, or are you the happy-go-lucky, lover of life? One of these paths will lead you to your goals. The other will destroy your dreams and make you a slave to misery. Maybe today is the day to choose which way you are going to go.

Love…

A super-successful person loves people. He/she can spend hours around people and can overlook the problems that people put in their way. Love is such a jaded word today—but a truly successful person loves everyone.

Desire

What do you truly want from life? That’s the biggest question you can ask yourself. What do you desire? How can you make that desire a reality? How can the way you treat others better your life? How can helping others reach their desired goal in life help yourself? These are questions to ponder on your way through life. Will helping others help you? A large percentage of successful people would say that it will.

Forget Everything You Know

Sometimes the pre-programming we all have makes us angry, disappointed, jaded. Sometimes we just need to forget all that we know and relearn how to live, love and work. Sometimes all it takes is a casual reminder to yourself to forget the old ways—learn the new ways. Embrace positivity.

Life Is Always Fun

Every single day, we all go through changes, problems and journeys that change the way we look at the world around us. Sometimes all we need to realize is that the world we live in is controlled by us. We control and experience every single kind of situation. Have you ever considered trying to just spend your day marvelling at the things that go on around you? Try it—you will be amazed.

Forget Worry

Worry is the root of all evil. Worrying about losing your job, losing your house, losing your wife, losing your husband. Worry is all the things that hold us back. Try to forget all of the things that make you upset, tired or that drain your energy. Try to focus on all of the good that happens every single day. Because every single day something good DOES happen to you! You can bet your life on it.

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Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 13

fear1The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered. This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to look at a fairly common fear that stops people from reaching their full potential—a fear called Acrophobia, which is a fear of heights that can stop many people from actually taking the first step toward their dreams.

Acrophobia may manifest itself in many ways, but is the extreme or irrational fear of heights. It’s not the same as vertigo, which is an inner ear problem that makes you think that you’re moving even when you’re not.

Recognizing Your Phobia

If you’re in a high place, do you feel like you will fall or jump off the edge? Do you suffer from panic attacks, dizzy spells and feeling faint? This condition can be triggered by a variety of every day activities such as travelling on a lift or escalator, parking in a multi-story car park or climbing a ladder. The thoughts and physical sensations are harmless but can be so distressing that it seriously limits the sufferer’s enjoyment of life, and can stop you from fulfilling your potential. Imagine if you had to make a business deal in a skyscraper—but couldn’t face going to the fifth floor? How about needing to meet that all important person for lunch—but not being able to reach the top of the building, where the restaurant is situated? If you suffer from acrophobia you may never be able to achieve the things you truly want to achieve.

Overcoming Your Phobia

Throw Yourself In

One of the most common ways of overcoming this phobia is just to “flood” it, in other words, just throw yourself right in and use your willpower to climb those stairs and stare out of the windows of a skyscraper. This could also mean skydiving, bungee jumping, or other extreme ways of getting to grips with your fear of heights. However, recent surveys have said that only a small percentage of people have overcome their phobia this way.

Small Steps

Another way to get to grips with your phobia would be to take small steps, until you feel comfortable to take some more. For example, you could try placing a ladder outside your home and climbing one step at a time. This would allow you to overcome your phobia at your own pace.

Thinking Is Doing

Sometimes the best way of combating a condition like acrophobia is just to change the way you think. Ask yourself why this condition scares you so much—what is it that bothers you so much about heights? Why are you scared to go on that elevator? Sometimes, it’s all down to defeating the demons in our minds.

Time

The most important thing is to realize that you have all the time in the world to overcome your phobia. There is no rush—take your own time and realize that only you can do it. Know that it could take a long time to get over your phobia—but it will be worth it in the end.

Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, DNP, MA, BSN
Your Vision Midwife, Lifestyle Entrepreneur
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Publishing Your Book: Amazon: Part Six

once uponAfter writing a book, many people want to know how one goes about publishing a book. A well-known author once said recently that “it’s no great feat to get one’s book published—it’s no great mountain to climb.” He is right, but his opinion is subjective. To you, reading this blog, it is a huge mountain to climb to get your book published. There are many paths you can take up that mountain, but it is still a huge feat.

Amazon is a huge online seller, who have recently moved into brick and mortar stores. Sales take place on Amazon every single second of every single day. For an author, it’s almost essential for you to have your book placed on Amazon, and those authors who ignore Amazon are making things much harder for themselves. In this article, I’d like to go over some of the details of working with Amazon. We will begin with rankings.

Rankings

As soon as you make your first sale on Amazon, your book will gain a ranking. The ranking shows how well your book is selling. The slower your sales, the further your ranking will fall. There are many millions of books on Amazon, so your ranking can, quite easily, be in the millions. As you sell more books, your ranking will climb. Several sales an hour will see your book inch slowly up the bestseller charts. When your book reaches a high enough position with its ranking, it will start to figure in the category’s top 100s. These are the 100 bestselling books in your chosen categories. Featuring in those top 100s will give you more exposure and more sales.

Searching for Books

The keywords you choose when you upload your book to Amazon will feature heavily when it comes to having your book found by readers. So think carefully about the way people search for books in your genre. Do they search for “action-thrillers,” or do they search for “books like Ben Hur?” How do people find the books? Get out your pen and paper and list how you personally find the books you read, but be aware you can’t use the names of famous people in your keywords—so don’t get caught with “books with John Wayne” as you are highly likely to get a warning from Amazon about using such terms.

Pricing

Pricing is key to selling books. Look at the other books in your genre and see how they are priced. Also make sure to note the length of your book. If you have a short, 30-page book, it may be best to price it at 99 cents. If your book is a huge bonanza—try $3.99, and don’t be afraid to try price promotions, either.

Cover

Be sure to look at the cover you’ve put together for your book, and remember that people will only see it as a little thumbnail. Does your cover stand out when it’s a third of its size as a thumbnail? Some authors put together exceptional covers without ever realizing that browsing readers will only ever see a small image of their cover. If it doesn’t stand out, people aren’t going to buy the book.

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It’s Warrior Wednesday, and You Make Your Own Music

fear11“The rhythm of life beats every single day… can’t you just feel it?”

Have you ever had a day where things just seem to work so well you can’t believe your luck? That’s the rhythm of life, and that rhythm is beating every single day—it’s just that on certain days it beats louder—and clearer—than on others. When it’s at its loudest, it will propel you through your day and allow you to meet objectives with ease.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could feed off the rhythm of life every single day? Can you imagine how unstoppable you would be? You would be like a human cannonball shooting through your days, making achievement after achievement count, and having the world hanging from your every word. The way many people tap into this rhythm is through meditation. So this week, I am going to share a meditation with you that may very well help you tap into that magic rhythm.

Choose your mantra

A mantra is a word or phrase that you silently repeat to yourself during meditation. The purpose of the mantra is to give you something to put your attention on other than your thoughts. You may use any phrase you like.

Find a comfortable place to sit

It’s best to find a quiet location where you won’t be disturbed. There is no need to sit cross-legged on the floor unless that is comfortable for you. You can sit on a chair or sofa or on the floor with your back against a wall. You may support yourself with cushions, pillows or blankets. The goal is to sit as upright as possible while still remaining comfortable.

Close your eyes

Once your eyes are closed, you can begin your meditation. Simply start by taking some deep breaths. Try taking a few “cleansing breaths” by inhaling slowly through your nose and then exhaling out your mouth. After a few cleansing breaths, continue to breathe at a normal, relaxed pace through your nose with your lips closed.

Slipping into your meditation

Allow yourself to slip into your meditation by repeating your mantra silently to yourself without moving your tongue or lips. The repetition of your mantra is always relaxed. The mantra does not need to correlate with the breath, though some people prefer to do so. As your meditation continues, allow the breath to fall away into its own rhythm. The repetition of your mantra should be next to effortless. Sometimes it is helpful to imagine that rather than repeating the mantra to yourself, you are actually listening to it being whispered in your ear.

No need to clear your mind

You will inevitably find that you drift away from the mantra. It is human nature for the mind to wander. Just allow your mind to go wherever it wishes, and find the rhythm of life. The further you get into your meditation, the more ideas will spring out at you; and as the ideas flow, you will hopefully start to feel rejuvenated and excited about the future.

Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, DNP, MA, BSN
Your Vision Midwife, Lifestyle Entrepreneur
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Holding Back the Fears: Conquering Fears — Part 12

fear11The only thing normally holding many people back—and away from their dreams—is themselves. They suffer from terrible fears when they try to better their lives. Inner fears like frustration, failure and lack of confidence allow some to be talked out of success by their own demons. These fears control the lives of many people but can be conquered. This new series of blog articles is all about fears that will hold you back—and how to conquer them. This week we are going to look at a fairly common fear that stops people from reaching their full potential—a fear called Anthropophobia, which is really an acute form of shyness that stops many people from actually taking the first step toward their dreams.

Anthropophobia may manifest itself in many ways—common manifestations are fears of blushing or meeting others’ gazes, awkwardness and uneasiness when appearing in society.

Recognizing Your Phobia

Most of us feel a little like shying away from people every now and again. Certain situations, mood swings and situations can all lead us to not ‘feeling like associating with others.’ In case of anthropophobia however, the mere thought of socializing can trigger a plethora of physical or psychological anxiety symptoms.

If you have anthropophobia, you avoid people at all costs– you might even fear close friends and relatives and perceive them as being threatening as much as a stranger. Any person with the extreme fear of people understands that their fear is illogical. Despite this, they let the phobia affect their daily lives, education or occupation. They arrange activities so that there is minimal interaction with people.

Overcoming Your Phobia

We Shall Overcome

The first step towards overcoming this phobia is to realize that it can be beaten. You can overcome anthropophobia.  Only when you believe that you can beat this condition will you actually beat it. It’s not invincible at all.

The Mantra Is…

Sometimes, it all comes down to realizing that the world we live in today is a big and, in many cases, a dangerous place to live. Yet we can live perfectly wonderful lives during our time on Earth. Many people who suffer from anthropophobia find that they can actually improve their daily lives through the use of “mantras.” Try repeating a mantra along the lines of “people do not notice what I think they notice” and see if that allows you to punch a few holes in this phobia’s walls.

Thoughts and Behavior Count

Modifying thoughts and behavior will be essential as you fight to combat this phobia. For example, “people are laughing at me because I look fat” should be changed to “people are not thinking about me at all because they are so wrapped up in their own lives.” It’s about seeing the reality of a situation. You are not on the minds of others—don’t put other people on your mind. Writing down negative and subsequent positive thoughts can also be beneficial.

Time and the River

Meditation is a common solution to many problems. Try finding a quiet spot and reflect on why you are having these issues. Try to spend some time clearing your mind, relaxing and finding out how you really feel about yourself.

Dr. Princess Fumi Hancock, DNP, MA, BSN
Your Vision Midwife, Lifestyle Entrepreneur
Radio/TV Host
https://www.periscope.tv/Princessinsub
https://katch.me/PrincessinSub/
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